Manage difficult personalities within your team

Some employees can pose real problems. Despite the efforts made to manage them, they are repeatedly late, make mistakes, or are aggressive. What to do?

Try to understand the underlying behavioral problem

Engage in dialogue to identify the root causes, e.g. Unexpressed frustration, a personal problem, etc.
Try to trigger positive momentum with the employee, e.g. How does he or she see the situation evolving? What does he or she want? What action plan to establish?

Try to limit the negative impact

Adapt the person’s assignments and interactions in the company to minimize the harm done, e.g. If the person is aggressive, avoid giving him or her management responsibilities.
Depending on the circumstances (bad will, big influence on others), don’t hesitate to impose sanctions to keep the situation from degenerating.

Take action

Everyday tensions, if ignored, can degenerate into conflicts and undermine the capacity of the team members to work well together.

Continuously be vigilant to spot in your team a situation that could degenerate. E.g.: Refusal to communicate, aggressiveness, deteriorating working conditions.

Listen to the feedback of both the team members who feel aggrieved and the aggressor. E.g.: Give everyone the possibility to express their position.

Talk with the “aggressor” to understand the reasons behind his behavior and invite him to propose a solution, but don’t forget to recall the rules. In the event of an affront to dignity or of violence, stand firm. E.g.: Sanction him and refocus without delay.

Dare express your disagreement (10 min)

Out of fear of conflict, respect of the hierarchy or simple energy saving, we often tend to withhold our dissent. Wrongly!

Identify a behavior that recently disturbed you, about which you did not dare say anything.

Prepare your arguments in writing and try to anticipate your counterpart’s objections. If needed, rehearse with a person you trust.

Then, during the meeting, express your dissent and the reasons behind it. Do not try to justify yourself or to apologize for it. Listen carefully to the arguments of your counterpart. Don’t hesitate to stop the meeting if the discussion gets heated.

Then take a moment to analyze what happened and what you would do differently.

Define your strategy to manage a difficult team member (10 min)

Some people are more difficult to manage than others. Understanding their shortcomings helps to better identify the steps to take.

List the issues regularly faced by this team member. E.g.: Verbal aggressiveness, repeated mistakes, dissimulation, double talk. Try and focus on the facts while withholding judgment on the person.

Identify the impacts of his behavior. E.g.: She demotivates her colleagues, his mistakes damage the reputation of the team, he offloads onto others, etc.

Try and make this staff member aware that he/she must change. If you don’t succeed, take measures to reduce his/her impact on the rest of the team.

Practical Tips

> How to manage difficult personalities in your team

> Detect toxic behaviors before they degenerate

> Expressing disagreement: the pitfalls to avoid