Developing a constructive relationship with your boss is critical to ensure the well-being and performance of all concerned. However, hierarchical relationships are naturally difficult. How to improve the situation when you are not in a position of authority?
Identify where you complement each other
- In your view, what are the strengths and weaknesses of your boss? Your own? Consequently, where could you be useful to him or her, e.g. Keep careful track of projects if your boss is too busy or disorganized to do so.
Establish a clear framework for the relationship
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Schedule a time to work together to define suitable interaction practices, because we may not always realize when people aren’t comfortable with our natural communication style (written or verbal, succinct or exhaustive, etc.).
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Clarify respective expectations, e.g. What criteria will be used to judge how well you are doing? What are you expecting in terms of resources or support?
Use dialogue
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…to resolve your differences, e.g. Don’t hesitate to calmly express your feelings (frustration, dissatisfaction, etc.). Listen to your boss’s reactions to arrive at a shared understanding.
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… to avoid misunderstandings, e.g. Explain that you find it helpful to express your point of view, without necessarily challenging your boss’s authority.
Take action
Ask for a meeting to clarify your boss’s expectations (1h)
Many misunderstandings arise from a wrong interpretation of your direct line manager’s expectations.
Make a list of your assumptions of your boss’s expectations and discuss them during the meeting. While doing this, ensure you do not project your own expectations and aspirations over your superior.
Among your objectives, what are the top priorities? On what aspects can you not compromise?
In what ways can you help him reach his own objectives? E.g.: your objective is to increase revenue. Maybe he is actually measured against the profit margins…
In his own view, what does reaching the objective mean, and how will he review your performance? E.g.: is the speed of execution more important than the perfection of the achievement?
What does he expect on the manner in which you will reach your objectives? What would disturb him?
What does it take to secure his trust? What could hinder it?
Step back and think of your rapport to authority (10 min)
We don’t all have the same markers to assess what a hierarchical relationship should be.
Ponder over your relationship with your manager. To what extent is this relationship impacted by your respective conceptions of authority?
On which aspects are you spontaneously in sync? On which do you risk confrontation? E.g. does it seem preferable to you to accept his decisions out of principle, or do you find it more normal to seek to express your point of view?
What can you do to facilitate your relationship? E.g.: do not contradict him/her in front of others, but ask for a meeting to express your disagreement (and remind him/her it does not equate to a lack of respect or trust).
Identify how you and your boss can be complementary (10 min)
Your boss is probably not perfect… Consider his/her limits as an opportunity to make yourself useful!
Make a list of your respective strengths and weaknesses: according to you what are the strengths and weaknesses of your boss? And yours?
From this list, establish the aspects for which you can remedy such weaknesses. For example, propose to monitor the activities for your superior when he/she has little availability; use your diplomatic qualities to negotiate some margins of maneuver with a business unit boss who is little prone to collaboration; etc.
Similarly, do not hesitate to ask your boss’s support when you need his expertise and his competency.
Practical Tips
> Surmount hierarchical relationship pitfalls
> Clarify the relationship with your boss
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© Managéris